No smoking at computerSunday, April 1, 2007 at 18:41 | Posted in Bureaucracy, computer, eu, health, smoking | Leave a comment
Tags: April Fools
Peter writes about a fresh EU proposal to ban smoking while using a computer. An alternative approach could be banning sales of used computers. The ban is to ensure that no harmful particles in tobacco smoke would be layered on the inner surfaces of a computer and blown by the ventilator and breathed in by a non smoker who bought the computer as used.
As reported by several reliable blogs, the smoking ban has been prepared in secret and it took effect at midnight GMT today 1st April 2007. The chief of EU commission’s press and disinformation service, Ms. April Lügnerin, confirms that the pan European smoking ban was debated by the European Parliament in a closed session yesterday. As of today, smoking is prohibited in all spaces with a functioning computer.
If there is a computer in at least one flat of a housing unit, smoking is banned in all apartments. It is also not allowed to puff on balcony or yard because smoke could very well flow in to a flat with computer through an open window. To prevent infecting computers through breath, a smoker is not allowed to approach a building with one or more computers two hours after smoking.
The owner of a computer is under obligation to report possession of a computer to the landlord who must immediately declare the building as a smoke free zone. Municipal governments must hire breath sniffers to enforce the smoking ban. A sniffer is entitled to authorize a blood proof be administered to a person approaching a building with one or more computers to conclude if the person has smoked within two hours.
Violations against the smoking and approaching ban carry a fine of 1000€. The offender also has to compensate the cost of replacing all computers in the building.